Declaration of the Rights of Man and of the Spectator

With basketball season coming up, follow these rules to make the most out of your fan experience while not annoying others

Don’t be overzealous

The law shall provide for such punishments only as are strictly and obviously necessary (violence, profanity, nudity, etc), and no one shall suffer punishment except it be legally inflicted in virtue of a law passed.

Liberty consists in the freedom to do everything which injures no one else; hence no tossing of baby powder in the student section. This limit has been enumerated. The aim of all athletic association is the preservation of the well-being of students and mascots alike. Do not harass our mascot.

Don’t harass the opposing team

No person shall be accused, arrested or imprisoned according to the forms prescribed by law. Anyone soliciting, transmitting, executing or causing to be executed, any arbitrary order, shall be punished. In addition, discrimination based on the loyalties of an individual is unlawful.

You don’t need a campsite to watch a game

The security of the rights of fans does not require gratuitous accommodations. These forces are, therefore, established for the good of all and not for the personal advantage of those to whom they shall be entrusted.

Those in the student section are and remain free and equal in rights. Accessibility distinctions may be founded only upon the general good.

Since property is an inviolable and sacred right, no one shall be deprived thereof except where public necessity. Each individual is entitled the whole of one seat and therefore will be expected to take up no more and no less, unless in the situation that physical limitations render that impossible.

Keep language clean

No one shall be disquieted on account of their opinions, including their more controversial views, provided the manifestation of their speech does not hinder a child’s upbringing.

The free communication of ideas and opinions is one of the most precious of rights. Every citizen may, accordingly, speak, write, and print with freedom, but shall be responsible for such abuses of this freedom as shall be defined by law. Or in this case, probably, in-school suspension.

Watch your head. People throw stuff (beach balls are OK, water not so much).

A common contribution is essential for the maintenance of the public property. This should be equitably distributed among all the citizens. (Or you could just clean up after yourself.)

No saving spots

No body nor individual may exercise any authority which does not proceed directly from the nation. The people of our school nation deserve a chance to sit close if they arrive early. There is no right to save seats.

Don’t be a Debbie Downer

Law is the expression of the general will. Every citizen has a right to participate personally, or through his representative, in its foundation. All citizens, being equal in the eyes of the law, are equally eligible to all dignities and to all public positions and occupations, according to their abilities, and without distinction except that of their virtues and talents. However, bothering to attend a gathering and bringing poor spirits is cause to be ostracized.